the feelings that plague my mind are out of control
it is so weird that i lose all my senses
where did all this begin ? where does it come from
my spirit is weak, i’m feeling defenseless
but deep down inside i don’t want it to stop
i love the story that my mind is thinking of
where will it go when I close my eyes tonight
almost makes me feel like i’m in love
a little crush is all that it is
and all that it can ever be
so its a little secret love affair
just between you and me
How funny to have this as a topic … we have spent the last 3 weeks saying “CHEESE”
Let me take you back to July 2007 …. Hubby and I are travelling along Route 66 in the USA – a perfect roadtrip for us Aussies, we’re having a fabulous time … and the differences in the “English language” hasn’t proved too much of a problem – we can usually make ourselves understood … like asking for a ‘restroom’ not ‘where’s the loo’ and taking an ‘elevator’ not ‘the lift’ …..
We were in Missouri and visited an Indian trading post …. it wasn’t the friendliest of places, we felt like we were being watched the whole time we were there (making sure we weren’t stealing anything), we made our purchases and headed out the door … as per his normal self my hubby said “Cheers” as he walked out. We headed to the car to find the woman from the store running after us …. “WHAT DID YOU SAY? ” she said threateningly !!
“Cheers” replied hubby …. “it means, goodbye, see you, thanks, have a nice day, that sort of thing”
“hmmmm” she says … “I thought you said CHEESE”
This of course set us off for the rest of the trip saying “Cheese” all the time … fast forward to the last few weeks and us on our third trip down 66 .. and it brought back the “Cheese” memory and we found ourselves saying it all over again. Especially with our friends who knew the story from last time.
I also now have a “BEER” story … we went to visit with a friend on the Route, and he had a bear skin rug on his lounge room floor, I’d never seen a ‘real’ bearskin rug before ….
so I said to my mate “Can I take a photo of your bear on the floor”
he looked at me … and put his BEER on the floor and said “gee you Aussies have some funny habits”
who knew English was so hard to understand !!!!
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Beer on the floor vs Bear on the floor
I actually like being an adult … well …. sometimes I still feel like I’m 15 when I’m with my best friend and something stupid can set us of giggling like school kids …. laughing so hard it hurts … or laughing so hard you think you might pee yourself and then suddenly realising you ARE old when you almost do !!!
I like being an adult and having a say in my life .. not being directed around my someone else. I love being able to say no and to do what i want. I like being an adult and staying out late and having fun with friends and knowing I can sleep in the next day to recover.
I feel like i’ve been a grown up forever … sometimes i wish i could have part of my childhood back … but then again – i’ve had a great life and why would i need to change anything ???
Something a little different this week…… decide who you would invite to your fantasy dinner party?
The rules are:
– you can invite anyone, living or dead
– you have a table that seats eight, but as you are one, you can invite seven people
– you have to explain why you’d invite them
And for bonus points:
– what would you serve them for dinner?
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The table is set with my favourite purple table cloth, there are some low candles along the centre. The glasswear is sparkling and I await my guests ….. because it is such a special day … I’ve hired someone to cook, you know … one of those places that send out a chef to make and serve you …. how swish I feel.
The door bell rings …. I’m so excited ….
It’s Melanie … my awesome best friend, she’s flown down from Queensland … gosh I miss her living close to me, but she’s one of those special friends that even though we are far apart, we are still connected by the heart. I pour her a glass of wine (she does love her wine …. which does worry me a little sometimes …but that’s another story) and we start catching up on what we’ve missed since we last saw each other. I want Mel at this dinner because I want to share all my special moments with her ….. oh … there goes the door again ….
It’s Jackie … my other best friend, she and I have a much different friendship to my one with Melanie, but she’s been around for me, and I’ve been there for her, we connected over similar ‘drama’ in our lives and have been together since then, she can make me laugh like no other, but sometimes she is so over the top I get frustrated with her. She comes and chats with Mel, I’m glad these two get on together, Jack doesn’t drink … Oh my goodness ….. I don’t think I could bear it if she did … .imagine how over the top she would be. I’m glad she is here at my dinner, as there will never be any awkward silences with Jack around (I hope she behaves …. I’ve asked her to !!!) …. one minute .. I’ll be back
It’s Adam Duritz at the door ….. the lead singer from the Counting Crows, I’m so glad he came ….. as well as being my favourite singer …. he has this ‘aura’ about him that I’m dying to connect with ….. I met him once after a concert and I couldn’t believe how awesome this aura was. I want to hear more about his music and those lyrics … lyrics that make me FEEL the song, I want to ask about my favourite line from the song ‘up all night’ …. “I’d like to see your eyes, open up real wide, the minute that you see me” and ask him about when he had that feeling. His aura truly was amazing and and it wasn’t just me that noticed, Billie did too …. oh and speaking of Bil .. is that her at the door ??
Nope …. its Daz … my hubby, late …. hmmm just flown in from wherever his company sent him this time, I get so darned lonely while he’s gone. But I’ll bite my tounge about him being late and hope he doesn’t make too many gaffs tonight, I hate it when he tries to be funny but isn’t …. but then again … that is part of the reason I love him.
KD’s here !! … KD is my dance teacher and ‘new’ friend. I’ve been dancing for a few years now – but over the past few months I have been getting to know him better and would like to know more. He can make me laugh so much and his classic lines never get stale (“that’s not what you said last night”), well they do …. but I can never help laughing. I thought dinner tonight would be a nice relaxing way to see another side of him.
Sue and Gerrie have come up from South Australia – Sue is my self-adopted big sis, I met her online and her straight talking common sense won me over, and I wanted her advice all the time, the big sis I never had !!!. And her Gerrie .. they are the perfect couple, she knows just the right things to say and do and her calmness is something I endeavour to have …. they are so close – they only count as one guest !! I want to her to meet Jack, Bil and Mel … they’ve not met before, I bet she will have some great questions to ask around the table too. Was that the door ???
Oh look it’s Drew McAlister …. my favourite Country singer, he is going to play for us too. He’s just back from Nashville … I hope it all went well over there for him ….. I can’t wait to be able to say “I knew him when”, he’s such a down to earth guy – love him and his music. I can’t wait to hear more about how he writes his songs. The whole ‘story telling’ is so beautiful, and I know that is why he went down the Country Music path … I can imagine he and Adam will have a lot in common … as Adam shares his life stories through song too …..
Oh here’s Billie – she’s always late, my god how I love this woman, we worked together for about 5 years, I learnt so much from her, what an amazing woman, the way she thinks facinates me, I love her thought processes and always wanted to have her rational thinking, this is why we worked so well together and became fast friends, she and Melanie are the two people in the world that share my confidences in EVERYTHING … the only two people that know EVERYTHING about me.
Oh … the chef is about to serve the first course …. what do you mean there isn’t enough chairs ?? just drag some in from the other room … the more the merrier I say !!!
!
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how funny …. when I started thinking about this I had quite a few famous people in mind (I always say Adam as I really want to be in his ‘aura’ again) ….. BuT … then I started to think about who I’d want to share this great moment with … and all my friends came to mind …. so I’d be quite happy as my fantasy to have all my friends who are scattered across Australia and across the world together for one night ….. I’ll throw a shrimp on the Barbie !!!!
I anticipate that this is not going to end well
I can feel myself slowly sinking down down down down down
I don’t know how I can stop it happening
I guess I’m a bit more prepared this time around
But I’m still scared
I anticipate that the thoughts I’m having will go nowhere
That the dreams and wishes are all empty
There will be no happy endings
And there is nothing I can do to stop it happening
I’m prepared
But still scared
Where in the world did this idea that has been fermenting in my head come from ?
When I look back, it was all harmless really, a random thought, that someone fertilized with a comment, someone else gave it some water and before I knew it I had a whole senario going on in my head.
Where in the world do I think it is going to go ?
Do I really think, no matter how good it looks in my head, that the reality of the plan will ever work, there is really no chance that any of the daydreams can come to fruition. It just needs to stay in my head. In fact I’m probably happy for it to say there, because daydreams are more perfect than the reality of what it would be like day today.
Where in the world would I be without my dreams ?
These dreams and fantasies make my life so much more fun, to be able to close my eyes and escape the reality of day to day, while still enjoying my life. Each night I can slip off to another place, to enjoy the fantasy of my make believe world and then wake up and move on.
What in the world am I thinking ?
♥ for my muse DK ♥
shhhhhhh
no one knows about THE PLAN
THE PLAN is a secret plan
the formation of THE PLAN is not even complete
THE PLAN is fermenting in my mind
it bubbles away as the details form to create something solid
reality is. . . THE PLAN will probably just stay secret
i don’t think I’d have the guts to follow through with THE PLAN
maybe THE PLAN is not a plan after all – just another little mind game
it could really be that THE PLAN is just opportunity to indulge ???
You’re my secret little indulgence
You don’t know how much you’re on my mind
The images of you that make me smile
Where your life and mine are totally entwined
The daydreams of you that fill my days
Where you’re there to warm my heart
Sometimes it’s hard to tell
Where my dreams and reality end and start
I indulge myself with those thoughts of you
Those ones that make me smile
It’s these little indulgences
That make my life worthwhile
We’re all human
it’s simple really
black or white, rich or poor, blonde or brunette …. all human
fat or thin, short or tall, fast or slow ….. all human
old or young, working or unemployed, married or single ….. all human
it doesn’t matter if you sit in an office in Sydney, or out looking for food in the fields in a third world country ….. we are all human.
We live, we love, we breathe, we eat, we sleep ….. all human
the world would be a much better place if we could break everything back down to the HUMAN factor, if we’d all remember the same blood runs through our veins
and yes …. i’m not naive enough to think that everyone is perfect, and that if we loved one another without discrimination and racism that the world would be a perfect place, there are ‘bad’ people amongst us all – not of a particular colour or race, but amongst us all, but if we could get past the prejudice and stereotyping … we might just have a better chance don’t you think ????
Horatio Hornblower and a lovely dolls pram are the two toys I have from my childhood, oh, and a fluffy tiger that my brother gave me. These three things are very special to me. I didn’t get Horatio and the pram until I was 9 years old, which was a bit old really for that sort of toy. But it was the first year Mum ever worked so had some money to buy stuff, and she’d always wanted me to have a beautiful dolls pram. My daughter used the dolls pram too, and it is in the roof ready for the granddaughters that come along.
I was going to insert a pic of Horatio Hornblower here – he is a much loved teddy bear, about 2 foot long I guess, and patched and worn and still holds that same ‘teddy bear smell’ that he had … I can’t explain that … but it is a comforting smell. Not that long ago, I decided I wanted him out on the bed, but seeing him everyday wasn’t quite the same as having him put away and then finding him every so often and reminscing.
As my kids grew up I kept so many of their toys, I wanted them to keep for their grandkids etc …. my daughter is now 25 and on her last visit home …. we went through them all. She only kept a few things, and the things that I thought would have been her favourite … she didn’t care for too much !! Maybe they were MY favourite. She kept ALL her books though, she loves to read and will read anything. So now, sitting not 3 feet away from me as I type are two boxes of toys that I am going to put on ebay …..
Now on the subject of ‘big boys toys’ – I confess to telling hubby today “Ohhhh yes you ahve to buy it” when he found a TOY mustangcar (he collects mustang toys) that played ‘life is a highway’ and the car ‘dances’ … well how could you say NO to that …..
……………………. I wanna ride it all night long .………………………….
Words Words Words 